Monday, August 30, 2010

returning to Happy

I have a back log of thoughts because I took a blogging break last week.  Some months, life kicks you in the gut.  or the pants.  or both, as has been my recent experience.  And then you have to figure out how to stand back up again and keep walking.  Injured yet alive.  Bruised yet breathing.  That is what this month has been.  I have decided to pack up August a day early.  Goodbye, ugly August.  You were not kind to me.  I'm going to put it into it's little box and set if high up on a shelf.  High enough so that the difficult things that plagued the month wlll fade into distant memory. Over the last month, I forgot how to be happy. Amnesia of the heart.  Does that ever happen to you?? I temporarily forgot that my life is directed by God and that I don't have to have all of the answers.  I misplaced my faith and began trusting in what was within sight.  My vision became cloudy, my intentions and focus obsolete.  I began fixating on all that was wrong and all that I didn't have. I allowed unkindness and feeling forgotten to define my moods and my demeanor, causing impatience and grouchiness to reign.   The places of disappointment in my heart were taking up more than their alloted space, crowding out the good things and making them almost invisible.  Oh, this is not the way to live!  Because the TRUTH is, that there is so much good .  Our weeked proved it.  We spent time in the  mountains enjoying God's beautiful creation.  We played at the pool, laughed and read and talked and participated in all of the goodness that is our life.  The time together was nourishing and refreshing.  There were smiles as we joined our hearts to form the circle of family.  Our family.  And THAT is the biggest reason to return to happy. 


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