I do it to myself.  Sometimes, I let comparison and self-doubt interfere with great things that I want to do.  "Why don't we have "this friend" over?", asks my sweet son.  It's his friend.  Why wouldn't we have our friends over?  How can I reveal my insecurities about the size of my house, the shame over my laminate counters, my disappointment in the condition of my floors to my innocent son.  HE doesn't care about any of these things - Why do I?  I wish that I had even a tiny amount of his innocence.  He hasn't been lied to by the magazines, by Pinterest, by himself.  For him, all that matters is that he adores his friend and that his friend adores him right back.  I wish that adoration was all that mattered to me.  I don't want to care about my floors or my counter tops.  I want to care about people.  I want to absorb myself in relationships rather than focusing on the silly external stuff.  This year, I'm going to have people in my home, remembering that it is our family and our love that makes these four walls what it is.  I want to put aside my insecurities and my concerns that I'm not good enough. I hope that this year will be full of relationships and our home will be full of love and the laughter of friends.

January 5

5 days into this new year, I'm looking for my MOJO!!  The vacation laundry has been done, the suitcases have been unpacked and I've been super productive... at least it looks like I have been!!  I don't FEEL productive.  I feel under the weather = probably because the weather is absolutely awful these days.  Cold, dreary, icy... Because of how sick everyone else got, I haven't slept much over the last few nights.  So today, I'm cold and feeling achy.  I'm hoping that tomorrow will bring new motivation and new feelings of excitement about getting back into routine.  I'm thinking about new goals and new directions all the while keeping the old balls expertly up in the air.  Schedules begin and routine will take over in the next few hours.   Tally ho - Let's go!

2015

Happy New Year!!

2015!!

I am on vacation in Texas and it is raining. As I listen to the rain, I'm wishing for a hotter and dryer place.   I don't love the rain because it keeps me from being outside, (only because I don't like getting wet).   We are enjoying being with new family and discovering what is new and great about Texas.

We've been gone from home for about 5 days.  I'm doing the first load of laundry on our trip, and we are onto the second birthday celebration.  Christmas and New Years bookend a few other celebrations in our family - Maddie's birthday, Michael's birthday.  We celebrated Maddie turning 14 and Michael turning 9.

Maddie is the most beautiful 14 year old.  She is so full of generosity and kindness.  She loves to read, she adores her friends, her room and her posts on Instagram .
She has the best taste in music, books and movies.  

Michael is celebrating turning 9 today.  What a joy my sweet boy is.  He loves soccer and football.  He loves the Broncos and Clemson.  Last night we asked him what the best thing in 2014 was, and he honestly answered "My friends".

I always have great hopes and wishes for the new year.  For 2015 I want to worry less and pray more.  To fuss less about the little things in life and place more importance on the things that really matter.  I want to "be slow to speak, quick to listen and slow to be angry."

Bless you, my friends and readers. For the moments of your time that you give me, I am appreciative.